Love Keeps No Record of...Rights.

Well, hello there. Glad you stopped in to see if I was being heretical.  I figured most of my readers are either long-time believers or current biblical scholars.  I had to get your attention somehow. Gotcha! Bwahahaha...that's my villian laugh.

I digress.

Looking back at the couples that I've had in my office, my friends' marriages, and even my own, I've realized yet another common thread that, often times, gets passed over.  1 Corinthians 13 is often quoted in premarital counseling, weddings, showers, and basically any other event where marriage is the focus. Verse 5 states, "it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs." So, advice-givers typically make the point of, "Don't bring up something your spouse has done in the past to use it against them in a current argument."  Pretty much all marriage counselors in the US will agree to that basic principle, believers or not.  Duh.

"Got that, Cari," you think.

But do you really?

See, I think we sometimes go about breaking this rule in a more subtle but just as harmful way.  I may not bring up a past offense in a...ahem...discussion with my husband, but I WILL start thinking of all the ways in which I have been right.  All the things I've done for him. The sacrifices I've made.  The times I did something I didn't want to in the name of "selflessness". In other words, I start keeping score.  But it's not a score of wrongs that he's "done wrong"...it's a score of things that I've "done right."  This is no more God-honoring than the record of wrongs.  It puffs up pride. It is horridly self-centered, and it is in no way Christ-like.

In effect, when we choose to do this, we are constantly reminding our spouse that WE are the superior being.  You are telling them, "I am the better half of this relationship. You should be thanking me all day long. You will never be as good as I am...at least until you do all of _______.  You can never win this argument because I hold all the trump cards with all of the good things I've done."

As if there is such a thing as "winning" an argument, anyway.

Friends, there is nothing wrong with loving and serving your partner.  In fact, you have been commanded to do so (and you've been commanded to do it respectfully).  You are to also cherish them. They are your best friend, your love, and your confidant.  However, the minute your pride starts keeping a checklist of the great things you've done (I've heard from my husband and his friends that this is particularly hard for men to avoid), you are no longer exhibiting the agape love that you have been called to. Your marriage becomes unbalanced, and the cycle of hurt and anger begins.

Protect your marriage, keep a list of the things the Lord has done for you. Review it. Memorize it.  You will not give grace to your spouse if you forget what you have been forgiven for.  Then, keep a list of how amazing your husband or wife is.  And, no, I don't care how long it takes you to make that list.  In the over-quoted words of Nike, "Just do it."


"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom"
Proverbs 11:2

Ticked Off Tinkerbell

When Addie was 3 months old, my sweet friend, Naomi, had come shopping with us.  It was Addison's first marathon shopping experience, and she handled it like a champ! A Disney fanatic  enthusiast, Naomi led me into the Disney Store.  On the clearance rack, we found the CUTEST little Tinkerbell costume (in the perfect size) and immediately formed a plan! Brad could be Peter Pan. I could be Wendy. Addie would be Tinkerbell. We could get a few friends to dress up as Schmee, Hook, and the Alligator that ticks (did he have a name?).  We would have the most adorable family/group costume ever!  Addie's first Halloween would just be an almost Pinterest worthy event!

*Fast Forward 6 Months Later*

While not chubby, my daughter is a whopping 90% in height.  She needed 12 month onesies for the length when she was 8 months old.  Let's concentrate on the days before October 31st.  I know I'm not getting Brad in tights for Peter Pan, so I settle for just a green shirt, tights, and a homemade hat with a red feather.  Supplies gathered.  However, we have a whirlwind of things happen that week (none bad, just busy).  My Wendy costume comes in.  It was super cheap on Sears.com, and, well....I got what I paid for.  It was horrible.  It wasn't comfortable, proportional, or in any way cute.  Although it was (almost) floor length, it was static-clingy in some very unfortunate places.  I would've had to buy a long slip just to be properly modest.  I'm not buying a $15-$20 slip for a $7 ugly costume.   Not happening.  Oh, and my sweet daughter then acquires some congestion.  Teething? Allergies? Spite?  Who knows.  All I know is that she didn't have a fever, nor did it seem to make her feel all that bad.

All these things combined started shattering my perfect little Halloween ideal.  Luckily, I happened to be watching Duck Dynasty, and it hit me!  Why not be Missy and Jase Robertson? The only thing Brad needed in order to complete the costume was a beard!  I had a beautiful bridesmaid dress (yes, I said beautiful...thank you Kristin Galle) that is almost identical to the one the Missy wears in the opening credits of the show.  Brad will be in his comfort zone, and I get to wear a pretty dress. We'll just improvise and say that Jase and Missy have Tinkerbell for a daughter.  Who cares at this point, anyway?

The day of Halloween, I find a long hair and beard set at Target (note: they put their stuff on sale the DAY of Halloween)...only, it's a dark blonde color.  After some trimming and creative use of mascara and spray paint, Brad had a perfect beard that only gave him a slight buzz that night.  I guess we'll blame his candy consumption on the munchies???  Although last minute, everything was falling into place.  Until 5:30 rolled around.  Brad and I were semi-assembled to be at the church at 5:45, but Addie hadn't woken up from her nap.  So, we waited until the last possible minute and woke her up.  We paid dearly for this mistake.  Not only was she very angry with the fact that we had woken her up, but she hated Brad's newly acquired beard.  Enter: The most ticked-off Tinkerbell you will ever meet.

The night was still a blast, as we both Trick-or-Treated and collected food for the local schools.  When we walked into church,  the room burst into laughter at the sight of Brad Jase.  One of my sweet GA's even exclaimed, "Mrs. Cari, you look BEAUTIFUL!!!" To which, I responded "Thank you, Sara," with my face beet red.  Little girls love glamorous dresses, ya'll.  Unfortunately, hardly anybody in the area around the church knew who the Robertsons were, and several just thought Brad was a really creepy guy wearing camo.  Here are the pics.

Checkin out Dad's new beard

Seriously, who is this guy???

Jase Pose

Still Not Happy

Pretty close, don't you think? I'm sure this would make a great meme...

Happy Halloween! 

Addie Claire- 9 Months and Life Lately

 It's hard to believe that October (my favorite month) has come and gone! The Holiday season is approaching which means two things to me (at the moment).  1. Time to get crafty 2. Time to make the most of the couple of months we have left in New Orleans! 

I'm so excited about Addie's first Christmas!  We're not going to be able to go full-out with decorations at home this year because of limited space and being in the moving process.  I think we might do a felt tree like the one found here.  I am NOT playing keep away all day with Addie and a real Christmas tree in our small living space.  I can see Little Miss Sneaky Strong Will winning that battle at least a couple of times.  No, the real tree will have to be enjoyed at my parent's house.  However, I do plan on incorporating as much Christmas as I possibly can this year with other little projects and items.  I am definitely making this ornament...I've been waiting to make it before she was even born! Of course, we'll have to substitute with pink glitter...and a really big ornament ball...baby girl definitely inherited my foot size.  

But, before we get to Christmas, let's catch up on the past couple of months.

Addison Claire: 19lbs. 29in long (Approximately 50% for weight and 90% for height)
Fearless.Loves Books and Cheerios
Claps Hands...even when angry:)Has 2 Smiles. One Sweet. One Cheesy.
Favorite Toy is a Pink Penguin from the Aquarium
26ish ounces of milk a day, 3 solid meal and will eat ANYTHING
Says "Dada" and "Baba"(Bye Bye, I think)
Has taken as many as 11 steps in a row!
Crawls on hands and feet (not knees)Takes 2 naps a day (1.5-2 hrs. each)
Will not perform on command.
Ever.

         

San Francisco in September 

One Happy Daddy on top of Maggie's Peak, Lake Tahoe

First (HOT) trip to the zoo.

Visit from the Givans and their sweet baby Graham!

Guess What?  There are now 3 mommy's in this picture!

Congrats Michael and Ashley!

THIS IS THE BEST PUMPKIN EVER!!!!

Second Zoo Trip

Baby Blues

First Baby Crush: Hudson

Visit from the Goldmans and Lily Joyce

Mini-me

4th Anniversary Dinner at Ralphs on the Park

This pumpkin is not nearly as impressive as the big one, apparently. 

*Note*

It is not that I neglect socks in these pictures, but that she pulls them off in the car. 

 

More New Mommy Moments

-Walking around humming tunes found only on your daughter's favorite light-up toy remote

-Your sweet husband then telling you that you need to get out more

-Learning to feed the child naked

-A new hatred of Daylight Savings Time

-A love/hate relationship with teeth, baby leggings, and walking

-Taking a swig out of her sippy cup because you packed her water, but not yours.

-Forgetting to eat because she ate and that counts, right??? 

-When your child looks at Duck Dynasty on the tv and says, "Dada!" Seriously???

-Finding the angry baby pictures the funniest.